comment fic meme

[mimblexwimble.livejournal.com]

It's that time again!

SPREAD THE WORD

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THE RULES

→ Leave a comment here with your fic and/or art prompt. This is a Sam-focused hurt/comfort community, so Sam should be the one in the hurt/comforted role. Your prompts may involve sick!Sam, hurt!Sam, angsty!Sam, basically anything that results in Sam being on the receiving end of hurt/comfort. (No rules against whumping other characters as well, of course, but you have to whump Sam first. ;) )
→ In your prompt, please state your desired characters or pairings and medium (fic or art). All genres/pairings welcome, but no real-person (RPF) prompts.

Example A: “Sam, Dean, gen, set in season 2. Sam has a vision and passes out. Cue caring!Dean and limp!Sam.”
Example B: “Sam/Dean, trauma. Sam is injured on a hunt, Dean freaks out when he thinks Sam might be dead.”

→ Post as many prompts as you like - but one prompt per comment. If you've got a couple, comment with each separately.
→ Prompts can be as short or detailed as you like. Remember though - more detail means less wriggle room for the writer, which might lower the chances of someone picking up your prompt.
→ Go through the prompts! If you find one you like, write a fic or create some art for it. There's no limit to how many users can reply to a prompt, or how many prompts someone can create for.
→ When replying to a prompt with your comment-fic or art, put ‘filled’ in your subject line and then anything else you want, like a title if you have one/part numbers. It’s not a big deal if you forget this step, but it will make it easier for people to find your fic. As subject lines are no more, please begin your fills with the word FILLED and a TITLE in BOLD - the first box on this page shows you how to position the bold tag for proper results.
→ If you notice that your submission is not on the master list after a decent amount of time (say, two days), please poke me in a PM. I might have missed it.
→ Please remember, if your fic/art includes potential triggers (non/dub-con, abuse, self-harm, etc.) please grey out your text using the following code and put a warning before.

<table bgcolor="grey"><tr><td><font color="grey"> SPOILERY OR TRIGGERY PROMPT/TEXT GOES HERE.</font></td></tr></table>
→ Anon posting enabled.
→ NO SPOILERS FOR UNAIRED EPISODES.
→ Play nice - no flaming and no character bashing, period. Any comments that break this rule will be deleted without warning.
→ Feedback is catnip for creators. Leave some love!
→ No spam comments.
→ Contact one of the mods if you have a question.
→ Spread the Sam love - pimp this meme!
→ Have fun!

NEW NOTE: Please feed the artists! Many members of this community are fantastic artists! Leave an art prompt to tickle their muses!

As always feel free to poke me or the wonderful ratherastory if you have any questions.


Master List

Untitled by electricmonk333
Sam's depressed after he finds out he's Lucifer vessel. During Dean's time in the future. Sam decides to test Lucifer's theory and see if he really will bring him back, but the angels find him first and refuse for the 'tainted one' to complete such a sinful action. Once Dean comes back and tries to call Sam, Sam doesn't answer.

Humpty Dumpty by cherry916
Wincest. Sam doesn't like to be touched after the Wall comes down. He's flinchy and wary and much more comfortable not around people than he is with them. Dean is the obvious exception.

Untitled by jasmineisland
Dean and Castiel have a bond, no question and they're becoming good friends and Dean is coming to depend more and more and Castiel on hunts. Sam however, is feeling more and more isolated and lonely because all of a sudden, Dean doesn't seem to trust him or his opinion. No matter what, Dean wants to check things with Castiel and Sam's becoming more and more depressed that an angel has replaced him as Dean's hunting partner and and he begins to drink. He tries to keep it hidden but Dean figures it out.

Happy Birthday, Baby by verucasalt123
Birthday's weren't an occasion for celebration in the Winchester house, and neither boy complained. But for Dean's 16th birthday, he got the Impala. For Dean's 17th, he got a really nice rifle he'd been looking at, again off hunting with John. [...] And when Sam does something stupid, crazy, (again, author's choice- trouble with cops, maybe hurt) that requires John's attention, this person reminds John that it is Sam's birthday, and since John has chosen to celebrate Dean's and not Sam's he's lucky whatever Sam did is all he did.

A Big Deal by verucasalt123
Sam is hunting with John and Dean when he gets scratched. It's nothing serious and Sam doesn't even bother telling his brother and father that it even happened, he just ignores it and drives on, but he picks up a nasty case of MRSA from his scratch and he doesn't realize how sick he is until Dean notices how feverish he is.

Alive by purple_carpets
An early hunt, Sam's 15 or 16, Sam gets the brunt of a slashing attack. (No one did anything wrong or stupid, but the critter got the jump on all of them.) Back at the motel, Sam needs to be stitched up but John's right hand has been injured - Dean has to do the stitches. It's the first time Dean has to stitch Sam up. It's okay if Sam passes out, but he should be awake for at least the beginning of the procedure.

Nothing Like a Handful of Dean to Make the Hurt Go Away by cherry916
Sam gets choked. A lot. What's the best homemade remedy he or Dean has devised to deal with those abrasions?

Square Knots by sweatyadonis
John and Dean wake up from their latest hunt in their motel room's to find their various injuries patched up after collapsing/passing out after a hard hunt. They discover Sam in the bathroom, where he got halfway through patching himself up before passing out.

Prayer Bundles by quickreaver
Sam and Dean settled, damaged but living a life, and I want Sam to suffer a completely normal loss: the (ordinary, not supernatural, non-violent) death of a loved pet. And it affects Sam a lot more than you might expect, maybe because there have been so many other losses that he never really had time to process. Dean is awesome and comforting in his own prickly, Dean way; some of the isolation from each other they've undergone in earlier, larger losses gets healed.

tonight i'll be staying here with you by 27_jaredjensen
Sam doesn't like to be touched after the Wall comes down. He's flinchy and wary and much more comfortable not around people than he is with them. Dean is the obvious exception.

Across the Threshold by weesta
Okay, so I'd love to see a teenage!Sam (like, sixteen or seventeen) passing out at school - particularly if it's something that requires hospitalisation OR if he's delirious and keeps asking for Dean but the nurse/admin people are having trouble contacting both Dean and John.

Lay This Body Anywhere by monicawoe
Post S7/Pre-S8: Sam finds out he can use his powers to bust Dean and Cas out of purgatory. He falls off the demon blood wagon. He tries to break them out, but it's a huuuuuge strain and he can only manage to grab Dean, and maybe the effort scrambles Sam's eggs a little, and he wasn't doing so hot with his magic mental health cure locked in Purgatory anyway. So basically, Dean comes back from Purgatory (in whatever state of wear you see fit) to a twitchy, hallucinating, migraine-plagued, babbling mess of a reluctant demon blood junkie.

Do These Pants Make Me Look Fat by verucasalt123
A curse of a different kind. As we know Dean shooting his mouth off can get them both in trouble.

This time Sam cops it instead of Dean. Dean gets his Sam(antha) with full blown PMS. She feels like utter crap, cramps, aches, pains, the whole nine yards.

So Dean being the awesome brother that he is, even if it squicks him, chick flicks, girly supply run; I'll leave that up to the author, every sweet she could want, all the while trying to either hunt down the witch or find a spell to rectify Sam's condition.

Bother by jacyevans
Ruby may be plotting to bring on the apocalypse, but she still has to look after her Champion, Sam. A tender moment when she helps him stitch or clean a hard-to-reach spot. Is she faking it or not?

Untitled by skylinehorizon
"Hello, Cruel World" missing scene: It takes A LOT for the Winchesters to cave and call an ambulance for themselves. With his leg shattered and Sam unresponsive and bleeding from his ears, Dean didn't hesitate to make the call. But it still took a few minutes for the ambulance to get there and in that few minutes, Dean didn't have much to do but panic and keep trying to get through to his barely-with-it, seizing little brother.

At the Beep by annonwrite
So remember mercury thermometers? They may have been filled with evil mercury, but they actually worked reliably until and unless the glass broke. The new digital ones, not so much! And even if they work right when new, they can go off after just a few months. So Sam feels really crummy. Like, can barely make it to the bathroom without collapsing. Checks his temperature. 99.1. Dean says or he says to himself something like: "Come on, that's a wimp fever. Suck it up." Finally Dean thinks to check the thermometer against himself, and it's actually reading pretty damned low. Guess Sam's not just a wimp.

Heavy Hitter by cherry916
Sam gets hurt during one of the "easy" parts of hunting. Dean makes fun of him a little, because really, Sam? But then he takes awesome care of him.

Teething by weesta
Sam's teething and the only thing that makes him stop wailing is to suck on his big brother's fingers. At first Dean is grossed out, I mean ewww baby slobber but than Dean is happy to oblige, if only to make Sammy stop crying.

Breaking the Cycle by jennytork
Suppose, when Dean prayed for help while Sam was detoxing in 5.14, he got Michael. And, in his despair, he said Yes. Suppose Michael put Bobby and pretty-much-human-at-that-point Cas away somewhere safe, because he's willing to be generous to his vessel. That generosity doesn't exactly extend to Lucifer's true vessel, of course. So Sam's in the panic room and no one knows he's there. For as long as it takes Michael to end the apocalypse. As long as Lucifer's alive, he'll bring Sam back if he dies. If he dies of the detox. And wakes up in the panic room. Or dies of thirst and starvation. And wakes up in the panic room. Or finds a way to kill himself. And wakes up in the panic room. Eventually Michael kills Nickifer and lets Dean go, intact, as he promised. Luckily Dean finds Sam mid-cycle, before he has time to die with no Lucifer to revive him. Or maybe not so luckily, given what Sam might be like by then.

Time is Relative by summerholt
[prompt same as above]

Pulse by tattooeddevil
Alternative to 2X21. Sam doesn't die, at least not right away (or preferably not at all). Dean in the backseat, holding Sam and begging him to hold on.

Untitled by tarotgal
The Impala breaks down one night, and Sam and Dean get caught out in the rain trying to fix it on the side of the road, which really sucks when Sam’s been coming down sick.

Point Blank by tarotgal
TW: non-con (possibly), child abuse

Sam's been acting jittery the last few times the boys have visited Bobby. He shuns from touches instead of embracing them like he did a few years earlier, and Bobby can't help but notice how quickly Sam's ten-year-old shoulders tense the fuck up whenever John is in the room. Bobby ends up gently confronting Sam about it, and after much prodding, Sam admits to John abusing him in the worst ways possible. Cue Bobby with a shotgun and a threat that if John ever comes within eyesight of him or Sam ever again, he won't hesitate to put a bullet into his head. Bonus points for guilty-Dean for not knowing what was going on, but staying with Sam and Bobby instead of following his father out the door.

Untitled by mentholpixie
Apocalyptic curtain!fic AU (is that a thing? If it's not, it is now). Sam and Dean survive whatever apocalypse you feel like throwing at them. [...] And then Sam gets sick. Really sick. And sure, there's a doctor or nurse or someone who was some kind of medical professional back before everything went to hell, but there's only so much he or she can do without proper facilities and equipment. Whatever the problem is, it's in Sam's heart or lungs. The doctor has a few theories, but none of them bode well in this new world without hospitals, x-rays, ORs and endless antibiotics. He's weak, prone to dizziness and shortness of breath. Maybe later there's a terrible cough. Whatever it is, it's more than just the flu or a chest cold. It takes hold and lingers for months and Sam ends up bedridden. Despite being in pretty amazing denial about the whole thing, Dean takes care of Sam, tries to keep his spirits up, maybe bundles him up and takes him outside when they're feeling adventurous but mostly, Dean helplessly watches him deteriorate due to something that was probably perfectly fixable back before the world ended.

Ashes, Ashes by ladybastet92
[prompt same as above]

Grace Period by rokhal
Sam get's turned into a dog sometime during or post season 7. He gets separated from Dean somehow, and like all stray dogs, is put in a kennel. And with memories of Hell already rattling around in his brain? Being literally collared and chained probably doesn't do him any favors.

Web MD by verucasalt123
Sam is sick. Cas really wants to take care of him, but he's a little confused about the whole thing and doesn't quite understand that Sam would just like to curl up in bed and cuddle with Cas and sleep for ten years, and not take medicine every x hours/get him temperature taken/breathe in steam/whatever else Cas found on the internet that's supposed to help.

follow me down the streams of sweat on your body by 27_jaredjensen
(Sam/Dean) Worried!Dean wants to figure out how high ill!Sammy's fever is, but all they have is a strip thermometer. Dean holds it to Sam's forehead but misreads the instructions and thinks he has to hold it there for 15 minutes instead of 15 seconds. So he sits there, soooooo close to Sammy. And, well, stuff happens. Maybe Sam knows it's supposed to be 15 seconds and doesn't bother setting Dean straight. Bonus points for Dean actually making it through the full 15 minutes.

Dangerous Game by leah_elisabeth
An ardent fan of the Supernatural books just loves to write fanfiction and she loves whumping Sam the most. Unfortunately, she's a terrible writer and no one reads her stuff so she makes a wish ( or casts a spell, or sees a hoodoo priestess .... whatever) that she could be a better writer and make her stories 'come to life'. Suddenly she starts writing the best hurt!Sam stories ever and she's got him sick and severely injured all of the time. She finally starts to get some readers that love her stories, so she writes more and more. In the mean time, the real Sam has no idea how or why he's getting sick and injured so much the last few weeks [...]

Knocking on Death's Door by dark_shadow85
Sam's depressed after he finds out he's Lucifer vessel. During Dean's time in the future. Sam decides to test Lucifer's theory and see if he really will bring him back, but the angels find him first and refuse for the 'tainted one' to complete such a sinful action. Once Dean comes back and tries to call Sam, Sam doesn't answer.

The Hours by kettle_o_fish
I had the pleasure of working on a musical called Floyd Collins this summer, and it's about a man who gets caught in - and dies in - a cave alone in 1920's Kentucky. It's a true story, which makes it worse when you learn that the man's brother crawled down under to him and stayed with him all night at first, and even though he couldn't get all the way through to him, he kept his hand on his brother's shoulder to keep him calm and got him through the night. I'd really love to see a modern rendition of this with Sam and Dean, especially since Sam wouldn't be doing okay in a small, enclosed space nowadays. With Dean climbing in there despite the authorities, distracting Sam by reminding him of happier memories, and staying with him through the night. I'd prefer if, unlike Floyd, Sam actually survives, but go where the wind takes you!

Hay Fever by anonymous
[art fill] Sam and Dean have to go undercover as farmhands. Sam has terrible hay fever.

i won't let you give up on a miracle by theangel_ahead
[read warnings at post] Due to some prior injury, Sam's left with disfiguring scar. He stays mostly secluded and is more or less content with that, content to let Dean do the socializing necessary to keep them fed and housed. But, Dean's come down with a nasty fever and there's nothing in the house to help - Sam's packed him in ice, cold baths, alcohol rubs, everything. He has to brave town to get meds for Dean.

Absence of Consent by jasmineisland
[warning for non-con] Under the influence of the love potion, Sam DID have sex with Becky. When he remembers, he blurts it out to Dean... who, being the insensitive, chauvanistic, dick of a brother he can be, mocks him. How does Sam deal with his brother's reaction? What about the emotional fallout of realizing he's a rape victim? Does Dean come to realize what a complete asshat he was, or does he remain ignorant? Of course, if you want to take this in a different direction, go wherever the muse takes you. You can even use another POV. All I want is a look at Sam's thoughts and emotions.

Stuck by leah_elisabeth
Sam wakes up to find himself locked up and sealed inside a very small chamber (what kind of chamber and how he got there is up to the author) He has no idea how he got there, where Dean is, or how he's going to get out. All he does know is that is getting hotter and hotter in there and he's quickly running out of air.

This Train Carries Lost Souls by madame_naan
gen, most likely a curtain-fic but it doesn't have to be. sam's having a hell thing and he needs to be left alone and untouched for a while, which is normally fine, he gets like this sometimes, except right now he has this hideous chest cold that's probably turning into something worse and it's scaring the shit out of both of them, but sam CAN'T be touched or moved or pretty much anything-ed right now.

What Comes Is Better (than what came before) by downjune
Always a Girl!Sam/Dean -- Sex to relieve cramps. Seriously, the messier the better.

Artemis by 27_jaredjensen
Sam/Dean: Sam and Dean settled, damaged but living a life, and I want Sam to suffer a completely normal loss: the (ordinary, not supernatural, non-violent) death of a loved pet. And it affects Sam a lot more than you might expect, maybe because there have been so many other losses that he never really had time to process. Dean is awesome and comforting in his own prickly, Dean way; some of the isolation from each other they've undergone in earlier, larger losses gets healed.

Bond of Brothers by ephiny1163
Early Season 5. Gen. Everyone knows about the Winchester boys co-dependent bond. Especially hunters. Sam has been sent to do pick up duty for food and supplies. Sam knows that it's because Dean can't really trust him anymore, with letting Lucifer out an all, despite how much it breaks his heart he understands so when Cas shows up to discuss business, Sam knows where he has to be. Except a pair of hunters have been watching the Winchesters for weeks, waiting for the time that they can get Sam alone. They know he's involved in something but they never imagined that Sam's bond with Dean, even when taken can prove useful for Dean getting him back. Basically I'd like to explore the idea that Sam and Dean are bonded so much that Dean can sense when Sam is hurt or where he is, to get to Sam.

to soothe the pain of wasted years by nblaque_impala
From Season 1, Missy Bender spent a long, long, long time in mental hospital after mental hospital and it's been almost 8/10 years since Dean took her family away from her. When she finally gets out she goes looking for revenge on Dean's only remaining family, Sam. Gen preferred but will take slash as well.

The nuanced approach to giving Sammy shit; or, The things Dean does to make his brother happy. by badbastion [with NSWF art!)
Sam/Dean. Sam has a cold and he is the most miserable person in the world. They still have a job to do and Dean can’t do much to make him feel better except, you know, shower!fever!sex

The Man With No Name by madame_naan
Any season or AU, Gen.
I was watching an old clip from ER. Cue obvious prompt about a traumatized, unresponsive Sam being wheeled in / carried in and Compassionate Yet Somewhat Jaded Medical Staff Members trying to work out what's wrong with him. Except on this occasion, the problem is not so much physical (or not just physical). Could be PTSD, Post-Wall, a case-related breakdown, shock... Either way, Sam is alone, no ID, not communicating, something is very wrong, and they try to figure it out. Or, you know, they just hold his giant hand and comfort him, that works, too. Doesn't need to be an actual crossover, of course; any ER/clinic will do. Just give me broken Sam being treated nicely for once and I'm a happy camper.

Rolling the Dice by snarkymuch
How many times does someone have to hear that they're worthless before they start to believe it? Perhaps there's some suicidal ideation there, or Sam simply throws himself in front of his father/brother when a monster attacks because he thinks he's worth less. What I would like was an injured Sam, with his father and brother slowly realizing how little he thinks of himself.

Closed Curtains by mollrach13
I would love to see a fic where Sam/Dean/Cas are in a threesome relationship, but lately Sam starts to feel left out. Dean and Cas are oblivious to Sam's loneliness. Sam tries to get the attention he craves from the two people he loves, but to no avail. The final straw comes when Dean and Cas do something really inconsiderate, like forget Sam's birthday, or exclude him completely from intimacy. Its when Sam is at his lowest that something bad happens. ANGST and GUILTY!Dean and Cas are the absolute must, just put Sam through emotional turmoil!

It's Just You and I, My Friend by madame_naan
Every time I watch "Dream a Little Dream of Me" I want Dean to yell at dopplegangerDean that he doesn't just take care of Sam because he has to, but because he loves his sam, damn it. So can I maybe have something shortly after John died where Sam tries to gently let Dean know that he's no longer obligated to take care of him, that now that John's dead he's released from that burden, and Dean going wait WHAT? and probably sam gets sick soon after and they both kind of realize that it's not just habit and it's not just duty that has him watching after sam, it's that he genuinely likes the kid's company and wants him to be okay.

I'll Huff, and I'll Puff, and I'll Blow Your House Down by 27_jaredjensen
7.17 prompt. Gen, please. Did you notice the scene where Lucifer's reading Sam a bedtime story? Between Cas' first attempt to heal Sam and the transfer of crazy? That happened in the cage too. At unpredictable times, cruelty would turn to kindness and Lucifer would comfort Sam like Dean used to when they were kids. At first Sam resisted, but when you've no hope, you take what you can get.

(Art) Gimme Shelter by badbastion
Sam is recovering from a bad hunting injury that landed him in the hospital for two -almost three- weeks. He just got released a few days ago and it would great if he could recover like a normal person, bed bound and doped up on as many happy pills as Dean can get him to take. But they're not normal, so Sam doesn't get to rest up in a comfy warm solace. The boys are forced to keep moving, away from the hospital, away from the police and away from every monster trying to get them on a daily basis. They hit a snow storm, and Dean has no choice but to drag dopey, sleepy (grumpy, lazy, bashful...) Sam out of the car and get them to the nearest motel/any-semi-warm shelter available before his vulnerable little brother can catch pneumonia on top of everything else his body is trying to recover from. Dean is sweet, gentle, and doesn't even make fun of Sam and the ugly ass scarf Dean makes him wear while they head out into the blizzard.

waiting and fading and floating away by 27_jaredjensen
[prompt as above]

R is for Reassurance by tarotgal
So, canonically, Sam has been called OCD (at least I think he has) but he isn't particularly. But. Prompt: he is. As in, full-blown panic attack if things aren't perfect, rituals he MUST follow, all that. Either AU, or it gets triggered by one of the many traumatic things* that have happened to him, unlocking his dormant OCD... Protective, caring Dean please.

Under Pressure by disasterifickaz
Post season 7 with Dean still in purgatory. Sam is working himself into exhaustion. He hasn't had any major injuries, just scratches and bruises, but he hasn't been sleeping very well because of the nightmares and he most certainly hasn't been eating. He stops in at Jody Mills place to see if he could find something in Bobby's books and she is absolutely horrified by the state he is in. Of course, she tries to mother him, but he will have none of it. Finally, she has had enough of his extreme stoicism and either slaps him, or pinches him or snaps him with an elastic band, something completely minor and barely painful at all. It proves to be the final straw for Sam and he collapses, sobbing and cries himself to sleep. Then he wakes up majorly sick. Jody nurses him back to health and even manages to find a few leads on how to get Dean back. If they then work together to get Dean out of purgatory, you would make my life.

Comments

[kate-mct.livejournal.com]

Set season 4/5-ish

Dean and Castiel have a bond, no question and they're becoming good friends and Dean is coming to depend more and more and Castiel on hunts.

Sam however, is feeling more and more isolated and lonely because all of a sudden, Dean doesn't seem to trust him or his opinion. No matter what, Dean wants to check things with Castiel and Sam's becoming more and more depressed that an angel has replaced him as Dean's hunting partner and and he begins to drink.

He tries to keep it hidden, but eventually(how it comes out is up to you), Dean figures it out.

Cue guilty!angry!Dean realizing that he's been neglecting his big!brother duties and helping Sam kick his borderline alcoholism.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Hope I do it justice... Went with S5 to avoid Ruby. After OTHOAP

When Sam entered the room, Cass and Dean stopped talking and looked up at him. For a moment, anger drove through him, but it was pointless. Whatever the Dean and Cass Club, as Sam had begun to call it, had been discussing, Sam was definitely NOT invited to hear.
“You bring food?”
“Don’t I always?” Dropping the bag in front of Dean, he turned back to the door. “Isn’t that all I’m good for these days?” As he shut the door behind him, he heard Dean mutter something about a cry baby.
At first he spotted a liquor store that was inviting him, but the bar next door actually looked better. Maybe someone there would at least talk to him instead of about him.
The bartender had filled his last glass of whiskey with a smile and a quiet statement that she got off in an hour. For a moment, Sam actually looked around to see if Dean had walked in behind him. Girls said that kind of shit to him. Not Sam. But no, the girl was looking at him and smiling. Stunned, Sam searched his mind desperately for something his brother would say. All he came up with was a slight shrug and a mention that he had somewhere he had to be, but if his plans changed, he’d be back.
He was kind of hazy when he opened the motel room door. It was dark and quiet. For a moment he was afraid Dean was asleep, but he noticed how quiet it was. Dean wasn’t there. Turning on the light, he saw a note on the table.
WENT WITH CASS. DON’T WAIT UP.
“Of course you went with Cass. And since I don’t qualify for the secret handshake, I don’t even get to know where.” He crumpled the note and threw it in the trash. “He can’t heal Bobby, you stupid son of a bitch. What the fuck good is he going to be if you get hurt?” Of course, he could just be out on his mission to get Cass laid again. The way Dean laughed when he’d told that story had actually broke Sam’s heart. Just because he couldn’t remember the last time his brother had laughed that hard at anything to do with him.
“Fuck it.” The thought of spending the night alone, missing his brother, made Sam miserable. At least there was someone who’d spend some time with him. And she was right across the street.

********
When Sam opened the motel room door the next morning, it was literally yanked out of his hand.
“Where the fuck have you been?”
His head was exploding behind his eyes, but Sam managed to shrug. “Out.”
“Out all fucking night. I’ll ask again. Where. The. Fuck. Were. You?”
“Sorry. Didn’t know when you were coming back.” Slowly, Sam moved towards the bathroom. “Need a shower.”
“No time, asshole. We gotta book. ‘bout a ten hour drive ahead of us.”
“What, your angel buddy couldn’t just flap his wings?” If the hangover didn’t kill him, his brother just might after that one.
“Fuck you. Be in the car in ten.”
The sound of the door slamming made Sam’s entire body vibrate with pain. It was going to be a long-ass fucking day. As he shoved his things in his duffle, he spotted the bottle buried there. After a short internal debate, he decided that being asleep would be better than enduring the contempt that he was going to get from Dean for the next few hours. Forever, is more what it felt like. The alcohol kicked when it hit his stomach and for a moment Sam wasn’t sure it was going to stay there. But it did, and a few more drinks and the throbbing in his head actually slowed to a pulse.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Part 2

Cass called Dean about six hours into the drive and told him the hunt was a bust. Sam was actually waiting for Dean’s usual bitch and moan session- aimed at Cass for bad intel. He would be eternally grateful that he hadn’t found this supposed hunt. He’d never hear the end of it. Instead, his brother shrugged and proclaimed that ‘it happens’ before he informed Sam that he was going out.
“Need to build the funds- I’ve turned into a fuckin’ welfare state.”
He knew the dig, as all of the digs Dean threw these days, was meant for him, but he managed to stay silent until he heard the Impala pull out of the parking lot. Looking around the room, another bout of guilt and sadness passed over him. Deciding on a shower first, he dug through his bag for clean clothes. He suddenly realized that he didn’t have any. Great. Of course, there was his trusty bottle. A drink or two first, just to pass the alone time. Opening the laptop, he started to search for the nearest Laundromat, hoping it was in walking distance. A subtle rustle behind him had him reaching for his Taurus and turning quickly.
“Cass! Dammit,” Putting the gun down, he sat back on the chair.
“Where is Dean?”
“Hello to you, too. I don’t know. He doesn’t give me his itinerary anymore.”
“Is he nearby?”
“Are you good at laundry?” Sam knew he was already on thin ice with the angel, but in all honesty, he didn’t give a fuck.
“I don’t understand that question.”
“And I don’t know where the fuck my brother is.” Lifting the bottle, he took a long drink. “I have to go do laundry before the next fucking monster tracks us by the smell.”
“Can you call him?”
“Can’t you?”
“My battery seems to be dead.”
“Fine.” Taking the dead phone away from Cass, the hunter plugged it into his charger before dialing Dean’s number from his own cell. Of course, Dean let it go to voicemail. “Cass wants you to call him back on my phone.” He hung up and turned back to the angel. “I’ll try to text, but odds are he won’t pick up.”
“I’ve never experienced difficulty reaching Dean.”
“Only when it’s you calling.”
The angel’s eyes tracked Sam, obviously confused by his statement and the tone of his voice, but the man didn’t care. Flopping down on the bed, he reached for the bottle. He almost choked on the mouthful of whiskey when his phone actually rang. “Dea-“
“Put Cass on.”
When the angel took the phone, he asked where Dean was, hung up, handed Sam back his phone and disappeared.
“Nice talking to you.” He stared at the pile of dirty clothes he’d amassed. “Fuck it.”
It wasn’t ten minutes later he heard the Impala pulling up in front of the room. Dean entered with Cass and looked around. “Good laundry. Make yourself useful.” Before Sam could even form an answer, Dean turned to the angel. “We’re going to need Devil’s Traps. About five of them.”
“I can take care of that.”
Standing, Sam turned to Dean. “There is a way to keep them-“
“We’re also going to have to keep watch for any security- might be some humans running around.”
This was something Sam knew about, and his brother knew it. “Dean, if you-“
“Leave it alone, Sam. Cass?”
“’cause Cass’s trap was so well built before?” The fact that Dean didn’t think he could put a Devil’s Trap together just hurt.
Turning, Dean stared his brother down. “Least he won’t drink ‘em dry.”
The words had the desired effect. Shifting his eyes to the ground, Sam backed up until his legs hit the bed and sat on it.
“Get the laundry done. We’ll be back tomorrow if not the day after.” With that the older hunter and the angel left.
Any intention of ever doing laundry went out the door with his brother. Reaching for the bottle, Sam decided he was definitely going to drink something dry tonight.
*****

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Part 3
Dean returned to an empty room and a pile of dirty laundry. Two days his brother had been here, and from the looks of it, he hadn’t done a damn thing. Picking up the phone, he waited for Sam’s voice on the other end. When all he got was voicemail, his anger turned to rage.
He was so busy leaving the nastiest message he could he actually didn’t hear the knocking on the door.
Ripping the door open, he wasn’t any happier to see the motel manager.
“Dude, where you been?”
“What the fuck is it to you? We’re paid through the week.”
“Been waiting for you to come back since yesterday.”
“What the fuck for?”
The manager stared at him. “Christ. You were my brother I’d be drunk, too. Before Dean could reply, he continued. “Mercy over on 5th Avenue. That’s where he is.”
“Mercy what?”
“Hospital, Asshole.” The manager was done with Dean’s attitude. “Your brother, he’s there.”
The word hospital finally broke through the anger and the hunter stared at the other man. “How did my brother end up in the hospital?”
“By getting so fucking drunk he couldn’t walk. And then trying to walk to the bar across the street.”
Staring at the manager, Dean tried to process what he was hearing. “Car?”
“Not even. Stupid son of a bitch fell of the fucking curb and split his head open all by himself. Not surprised. Seven fucking feet tall guess he’s lucky he didn’t just break his skull open when it hit the concrete.”
“When?”
“Yesterday. My night clerk saw it happen and since you weren’t around, she rode with him to the hospital. Said they had to pump his stomach he was so drunk.” He turned away. “Just thought you might want to know.”
Dean was speechless. Sam, so drunk he had to have his stomach pumped? Looking around, for the first time he actually paid attention to his brother’s side of the room. Lined up on the nightstand, were four bottles of Jack Daniels. A quick glance to the floor on the other side of the bed showed more empty bottles. Sam didn’t even drink Jack Daniels before. He’d been so worried about Sam drinking demon blood that he hadn’t noticed that Sam singlehandedly depleting the town’s supply of booze.
“I have news.” Cass’s voice cut through the silence and Dean turned to him.
“Not now.”
“But we-“
“I said not now, Cass. Sam’s in the hospital.”
“Was he attacked?”
“He was drunk.”
Now the angel looked confused. “You brother has been drunk a lot lately. What has happened that is different?”
Even Cass had noticed when he hadn’t. Grabbing his keys, Dean left the angel alone without answering.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Part 4
Thirty minutes later, Dean was staring that the doctor that put twenty stitches in Sam’s head.
“Your brother is very lucky.”
That wasn’t a word anyone would ever say about Sam. Or any Winchester for that matter. “He’s unconscious in a hospital bed with his head stitched together. How do you figure he’s lucky?”
“If he hadn’t tried to leave his hotel room, he would have most likely died from alcohol poisoning. Dean, this question might be very painful, but how long has your brother been an alcoholic?”
“He’s not addicted to alcohol.” Dean knew his brother was an addict, but it wasn’t to booze.
“You need to understand this. His blood alcohol level was over .4. That is lethal. The only way he was even still breathing at that level is because he has been sustaining a high level over time.”
“He’s a big guy, doc-“
With almost a sad sigh, the doctor shook his head. “That just means he drank a hell of a lot more. He should be waking up soon, and without insurance I can’t keep him. His head is stitched up, and for the moment he’s out of danger. I can ask our Social Services for a treatment center- “
“I’ll take care of him.”
“I just hope you understand how close we came to losing him this time.” As if he knew he was going to lose this patient, the doctor simply turned and walked away.
Trying to piece together what the hell was going on, Dean made his way to Sam’s room. The younger man was sitting on the side of the bed, obviously in the process of getting dressed.
“Sam?”
“Dean? What are you doing here?” Sam’s voice wasn’t much more than a whisper.
“What does that mean? You’re in the freakin’ hospital and you’re wondering why I’m here?”
“Thought you were busy.”
“That why you didn’t bother to call?” Dean was getting irritated, and his brother could tell.
“Not fighting with you.” Standing, he reached for his things on the table. “I fucked up. Again. I know it.”
Reaching for the taller man, Dean gripped his shirt. “You almost fucking killed yourself. Do you know how close you came to actually drinking yourself to death?”
“So what?” Sam’s voice couldn’t raise, but he tried. “He’ll just send me back.”
“You don’t fucking know that!”
“Yeah, Dean, I fucking do!”
“What about me? Think I’ll come back too after you get me killed on a hunt?”
“A hunt?” Suddenly Sam was pushing back against Dean and literally looming over him. “When’s the last time I actually hunted? Unless you’re counting hunting for hamburgers, since that’s all I’ve done lately. Not much chance of even ME fucking that up enough to be lethal. Oh, and laundry. Can’t die from dirty underwear, can you?” With a sad almost laugh, he moved away from Dean.
That actually stopped the older hunter for a moment. Sam was right. He hadn’t actually taken his brother on a hunt in a while. He hadn’t actually done much of anything with him besides drive. The bottles had been apparently collecting on the other side of the room while he’d been out…….
“Sam,” Turning, he realized that the taller man was actually headed out the door. He followed and kept the distance between them short. There was no response from Sam until they got to the parking lot.
“I get it. Okay? I get the why’s and the how’s and the million reasons you shouldn’t trust me with the no reasons you should. I’m tired, my head hurts, my throat if fucking killing me, and I just want to sleep. So we can pack up and you can just take me to the next drop off point.”
Unlocking the door to the Impala, Dean watched his brother get in, realizing for the first time how bad he really looked. He was thin. Thinner then he’d gotten even after Jessica had died. Dark circles under his eyes, and his skin almost looked yellow in the bright daylight. The shakes, from alcohol, malnutrition, or exhaustion, kept his entire body almost vibrating. He knew his brother wasn’t sleeping, visits from his own stalking angel keeping him awake. For a moment, he almost chalked up the drinking to that, knowing full well how easy it was to drink yourself into dreamless unconsciousness. But it was more than that. This wasn’t drinking until you passed out. This was drinking until you blacked out and then drinking some more.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Part 5
As he turned the ignition, Sam’s raspy voice carried across the car. “You mind if I wait till we get to the next stop to do laundry?”
“You really think I give THAT much of a fuck about laundry?” He pulled the car into a small chain restaurant.
Sighing, Sam sat up and reached for the door handle.
“Where are you going?”
Sad hazel eyes met his. “You don’t trust me enough to even get your food order right?”
Almost desperate, Dean searched those eyes for any hint of sarcasm, or maybe even he held a small hope for some humor. There wasn’t any. Sam was serious.
“You’re not my maid.”
“What else is there at this point?”
The sight of his brother almost in tears for being told he can’t retrieve dinner like a maid or a fucking dog was too much for Dean. “You’re my brother.”
“Something else I can’t fix for you.”
Again, no humor or sarcasm. Just a flat, despondent tone. Jesus Christ. The kid actually believed somewhere in that big ass brain of his that if he wasn’t playing fetch he was useless.
“Where in the hell did you get that-“ Cutting himself off, Dean realized exactly where his little brother had gotten that idea. From his big brother. His great big brother who has pretty much decided lately that Sam WAS fucking useless. Like the kid didn’t convince himself of that regularly with an exceptional OCD tendency.
“I’ll get it, Sam. Because you feel like shit, okay?”
It took Sam a moment to realize that Dean wasn’t being nasty. His face showed surprise at Dean’s concern, which only added to the guilt the older man felt. Had it really been that long since he’d taken any notice of Sam’s comfort? Apparently the answer to that was yes.
When they got back to the motel, Sam filled his already empty drink with water and sat on the bed. Spreading the food out on the table, Dean turned to him. “Get over here and eat.”
Again, a shocked expression crossed his brother’s face. Dean didn’t have to search his mind long for that one, either. He forgot the last time he’d actually sat down with Sam at a table for anything. Recent memory was always one of them sitting at the table, one on the bed. By Dean’s choice. And that was on the rare occasion they were both actually in the same room. Apparently that hadn’t gone unnoticed by Sam, either. Now that he was thinking about it, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d even seen the kid eat. Suddenly Dean wasn’t hungry. For the last god only knew how long, Sam had gone, as ordered like a good whipped puppy, to fetch his brother’s dinner, and probably hadn’t even gotten anything to eat for himself.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Part 6
As Sam sat down, Dean stared at him. “How long were you going to let things go like this?”
“What’s that mean?”
“I’ve been a total dick. Not like you to let that go for long.”
“It’s okay. I understand.”
“Christ, Sammy, I don’t want you to understand. I want to you tell me what a fucking asshole I’ve been to you and get pissed about it!”
With a shake of his head, Sam was staring that floor and pinching the bridge of his nose. For a moment, Dean thought the younger man was about to have some sort of seizure. Until he realized that he was just trying to literally pinch back tears. Dropping to his knees in front of his brother, Dean reached for his hands. “What? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” Sam shook his head. “Just didn’t realize how much I missed you calling me ‘Sammy’ until you just did.”
He couldn’t remember the last time he’d done that, either. He bet Sam could remember the date and time. Probably what he was wearing and what town they were in. Big girl was like that. He started to say that, but he stopped himself. Any joke at Sam’s expense wouldn’t be received as a joke right now in his head. It would just be more of the same. Dean berating him. It was time to stop.
“Okay, if you won’t say it, I will. Enough is enough. I’ve been a dick.”
“I told you I under-“
“I know you understand, and that just makes it worse that I didn’t see it. I’m not saying I haven’t had a reason, but I think the statute of limitations ran out a while ago and I didn’t figure it out.”
Dean’s phone rang. Sighing, Sam turned from him, expecting him to answer it. He ignored it.
“Cass needs you.”
“Cass needs someone to take the stick out of his ass, too, but that’s not happening right now, either.” He pointed at the shakes on the table. “I didn’t think when I bought the salad. Probably kill your throat right now. But how about you try to get those shakes down?”
The fact that something as simple and stupid as offering his milkshake to his brother completely shocked him seem to drive it home to Dean.
Before he could say anything else, Cass appeared in the room. “I tried to call, but I got no answer. I’m glad you are still here.”
“Not now, Cass.”
“I’m glad you are well, Sam. Dean said you were drunk.”
Any progress Dean had made with his brother was gone. The look on Sam’s face made Dean want to bitch-slap the angel. But he had to admit, at least to himself, that Dean had given the angel the impression that it was okay to talk to or about Sam like that. Some fucking big brother he’d turned into.
“I’m busy, Cass. Later.”
“Dean, just go. I promise I won’t leave the room. I won’t go anywhere, I won’t call anyone, I won’t cause trouble.”
A memory slammed into Dean. The words and the tone were an exact replica of teenage Sam to John when he and Dean would leave him to go on a hunt. It used to aggravate Dean when he heard it directed at their father, but it really hurt to hear it directed at him. No anger, just resignation. That this was the way it was, this was how it was going to be, and nothing Sam did would make a difference.
Time to change that. “Cass, go find a cloud to play in. I’ll call you when we’re ready to move.” Stressing the ‘we’, he hoped Sam understood. After Cass was gone, he sat on the end of the bed and stared at the younger man. “Here’s how I’m hoping this is going to go.”
“Whatever you want, Dean.”

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Part 7
“No, that’s not it. Drink the milkshakes. Then you can either get some sleep or you can go with me to do laundry, if you feel up to it?”
Sam stared at him for a long moment. The thought that Dean might actually mean he wanted Sam to go along, not to babysit, but because he might actually want the company was too much for the younger Winchester to hope for.
All Dean could see in his little brothers eyes was hope. If he said the wrong thing now, he’d crush the kid and he knew it. “Look, I’m making an effort, here, Sammy. I want to fix whatever the fuck went wrong between us.” He grimaced. “And didn’t that sound like we broke up.”
A soft laugh followed by a sad sigh. “Didn’t break up, Dean. Just broke.”
“So we fix it.”
Sam actually snorted, and Dean took that to be a good sign. “I didn’t say it would be easy, but I’m willing if you are.”
When his brother’s eyes met his, Dean couldn’t see anything but his little brother in them.
“I’ve been willing. Just waiting for you to decide to give me a chance.” Standing up, Sam moved to his duffle. When he pulled out the bottle, Dean wondered if Sam was going to have to drink to deal with him. Instead he put the bottle on the nightstand and started shoving his clothes in. “Guess we need to find a laundromat first.”
Just like that. With a few words from him, Sam was ready to let him back in and move on. Where had his little brother learned forgiveness like that? Sure as hell didn’t learn from him. With his bag over his shoulder, Sam grabbed both milkshakes.
Smiling at Sam for the first time in way too long, Dean followed him out the door.

[kate-mct.livejournal.com]

LOVED IT!!!!!! Exactly what I wanted!

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

SO glad. It kind of got away from me length wise. LOL

[cherry916.livejournal.com]

That was perfect.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I love to write broken Sam.

[litlove-hope.livejournal.com]

I was so pissed off at Dean when I was reading this, I couldn't stop swearing at him the entire time XD
This was awesome - a broken Sam, and a jackass and guilty Dean are the best mix! :)

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I was not happy with Dean in general S4 or 5 where Sam was concerned.

[tarotgal]

Ohhhh Poor Sam. Him heading downhill was completely understandable. And I loved Dean rushing to try to figure out what was happening and trying to fix it at the same time.

And, awwww, milkshake peacemaking.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

The Winchester way of saying 'sorry'. :-)
thanks!

[ashleymarie84.livejournal.com]

God, I just wanted to just slap the shit outta Dean while reading this. Kinda like how I felt about him during season 4... :/ I'm a sucker for broken!Sam and asshole!Dean fics where at the end Dean realizes just how unfairly he is treating his brother. This story was perfect! :)

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

I was pissed at Dean through most of S5. Bobby (possessed, but still....), Cass, Zach, anyone who felt like it jumped Sam's shit and Dean never said a word. I get the sibling nobody kicks my brother's ass but me. Dean wanted to rip the lungs out of whoever said/did anything to HIS baby brother. But S4 and 5 Dean stood back while everyone took a shot at Sam.

[phx69.livejournal.com]

LOVE THAAT. I always love the scenario where Dean has been a dick, intentional or not, and then feels guilty afterwards and is so good to his brother. This was love. Pure love!

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Thank you! (me, too!)

[sarahenany.livejournal.com]

This was absolutely searing. Brutal. I actually closed the computer because I'm crying and I'm in a cafe, then powered it back on just to tell you you made me - dang. This cut me really deep. Forgiveness. And the... maid.. oh... I have to go, I'm sobbing.

[jasmineisland.livejournal.com]

Thank you! I love as much as I hate how much they can inadvertently hurt each other.

[janicec678.livejournal.com]

LOVED all the angst and emo and guilty Dean!! (I can't REALLY see Dean treating Sam QUITE that badly, but if it WERE to happen, this is a really awesome vision of what it would be like!)

[wolfish-willow.livejournal.com]

Yessss, this is great. *rolls around* I'm so glad that Sam's finally getting his big brother back. And I love how forgiving he is. That's our Sammeh.

Love it! <3

[(Anonymous)]

you know you're fucked when this brightened up your day more than anything else